Be Back Soon...

I'm on vacation right now in Erie, Pa! "You gotta be quick! You gotta be quick with me, I'm from Erie, PA!" Little shout out to Boo there. =) I have some great pics and a nasty video that I can't wait to share but it'll have to wait until I get home (approximately near the 13th,) as I forgot to bring my USB thingy...yes I said thingy! We're having a good time hanging out with the fam and rye loves seeing her cousins. We'll be taking the big family picture for Emily's Christmas cards and I'm sure I'll get a few good ones of the 3 cousins. If anything ground breaking occurs I'll post it, but for now I must go! I always feel like such a bum if I spend too much time on the computer or watching TV when I'm here. I'll talk to you all later. Can't wait to get home so I can catch up on your guys' blogs.

Thanks...

I just wanted to post a quick thank you to the 3 people who post comments on this blog. You're comments on my "lost sheep" post were very helpful. they helped me to look at the situation in a while new way. God has really been helping me to notice my selfish nature. Bringing things up that I had never noticed before. I just wanted to say thanks and that I am so blessed that God has put you guys in my life to help me to become a better person....though right now I may just have to go and kill my child! RRRRRR!!!!
And men that are quitting dipping are total jerks!!!!

Daddy's little girl!

So, those of you that know me really well know that I am a Daddy's girl...ALL THE WAY! I don't know what it is, but I just think the world of my Dad! I know this is a little late for Father's Day, but I wanted to do it then, I just spaced...been doing that alot lately. And as Eric is not coming home until late tonight, I have the time right now. My Dad told me that when I was born, the doctor handed me to him before my Mom. Then he gave me to Mom. He said I was the only one he held first and that maybe that had something to do with the special bond we have. He wasn't allowed in the room for my two oldest sister's births (dang early70s), for Dani he was out to sea and for Beth she went straight to my Mom. I felt so special when he told me that. My dad has always had a special place in my heart, but that space somehow grew more that day. Don't get me wrong, I love my Moms..it was just different with Dad. When I got in trouble, my Dad telling me he was disappointed knocked me down quicker than anything my Mom could say. I was one that was always quick to apologize and ask forgiveness, I still am. I hate hurting people, but hurting my Dad? I'd rather die!
My reason for getting into this...I hope that one day Rye will have that kind of bond with Eric, but I'm afraid that she won't. There are still times when she gives him the cold shoulder or flat out doesn't listen to him and it hurts, because I can see the hurt in his face. I know part of it comes from him not being home, at work or away for work. She sees it as me caring more because I'm home with her. I've tried to explain that he has to work to take care of us and that he'd way rather be here with us than at work, I think she's starting to get it...but then she'll have one of those days. When she's just with him...like on Saturday they had a Daddy/Daughter date, she's great. Listens, has a good time. But as soon as I'm around, it's like he looses all his appeal. It's the same as when she's getting babysat. She doesn't act up, she does what she's told...as soon as I show up though, the whining starts, the baby talk shows up and the attitude. It's really getting frustrating. Does anyone have any advice on how to deal with this? Is there any thing I can say or do? Thanks for any ideas!
Sidenote: I know this is my 3rd post today, I swear it's my last. =)

B.G.B.S.

BIG GIRL BATHING SUIT!
So I never thought I would let the youngin' get a two piece bathing suit. But Rye really wanted a bathing suit like mine, so we could match. So, instead of getting her a full on bikini, we compromised and got a tankini. She can still pull it down so nothing shows or have just a little bit of belly show and she thinks our suits are matching. My little girl is getting so old now. She's such a pretty girl, we're going to have our hands full soon. Maybe sooner than we'd like. There's a little boy that is always at the pool when we go down there, he lives in our apartments, maybe a year older than Rye. They love playing together. He protects her and helps her. It annoys her at times but she usually plays along. She's such a peace maker, I guess there's a little bit of me in there too.

Lost sheep

So...I think I've come to realize why I have never been full throttle in my walk with God. I am afraid, very afraid. I'm afraid that if I do everything I can...doing devotions, having prayer time every morning, going to church, getting involved...that I still won't feel anything. I've never felt God, like I've heard other people talk about it. I want to, but I haven't. What if I go all out, I do everything and I still feel nothing? What will that mean? What will that do to me? I don't want to feel nothing...I want to feel SOMETHING, ANYTHING! I just feel so lost most of the time.
On that note...here's something else I've been feeling, I was going to make it a post a few days ago, so I'll just write it like a post, within a post.

A servants heart
I was laying in bed the other night, unable to sleep...and I started thinking. I am such a selfish person! That's why I don't want another kid, it would cut into "Kim time." It's always been about me. I hate this about myself. I can't even take a few minutes and play 'paper strip people' with Rye in the waiting room of the doctor's office because I might miss something on Dr. Phil. Why don't I have any of that child like playfulness inside me? I have to actually force myself to play games Rye wants to, like it's this huge inconvenience. I don't want her to be that. I want to be a Mom that's fun to play with. I want to be a wife who doesn't think about what she gets to get because her husband spent some money. i am just so sick of myself, especially when under the influence of caffeine or getting off of it. Even when I'm off it though, I just never seem to be in a good mood anymore. I don't know what's wrong with me. Is this my life?

I am SO the drama...

Will the gulit ever go away????? I keep contemplating having another child, even though neither Eric or Rye want one. And everytime I see a baby, I think, "Eh." But I just feel like I should want one, even though I don't. Does that make any sense? I love being past the diapers and spit up. I love not having to potty train anymore. I know I've got new challenges ahead...tying her shoes, reading. I'm scared to death of them, but I'm okay with it. I just want to move past this feeling. Like I've failed my daughter or my husband. Even though both of them are okay with how things are. I feel like a complete loser when I'm feeling this way. I keep focusing on what life could be like (with or without a 2nd kid) instead of being happy with the life I have now. I've been praying about it constantly, but I feel like I'm getting no where. I'm just frustrated so I thought venting on here may help. It has. I'll stop now.

One more time

Video Hosting - Upload Video - Video SharingSo, I had to do one more, because with everynew thing you learn you want to do it over and over once you've learned it. Nothing special here, just Rye pouting. She does that a lot, seems to think it will get her what she wants. Like I stated in a previous post, she's just like her Daddy. She's just do darn cute!

Big Time Prayer Request...

I found something...I'm not going into detail. Please pray for me. I'll let you guys know more when I do. Or at least when I've made an appointment to see a doctor. Thanks for your prayers in advance.

A little bit of Rye

Video Hosting - Upload Video - Video SharingYeah, I did it! Here's a little bit of Rye for those of you that haven't seen her in forever. She's getting to be such a big girl I really can't believe it. Thanks Heather for letting me kow how to do this. I'll be putting up more of her from now one. Eric and I not so much, we're just not that interesting and we both hate the camera. Hee Hee! I know it's a little short, my memory stick doesn't have that much memory. I'll be getting a bigger one. So anyway, I'm babbling, enjoy!

Happy Anniversary to Us!

6 beautiful years! That's the milestone Hub and I hit today. I think every year is a milestone. With Divorce rates in America being as high as they are I think you have to celebrate each year fully! How did Hub and I do that this year, you ask. I know that's what you're all thinking, didn't you know that I can read minds now. I've been working really hard on it. Our day started out as normal. We got up and we babysat our friend's 17 month old and took her with us to get Hub's haircut and get some groceries. Came home, had lunch and went to the apartment pool. Hung out for a while and dropped the Kid of at our affore mentioned friend's house so we could go out. And what fantabulous restaurant did we visit?!? TACO BELL, BABY! We decided we didn't need anything fancy, we just wanted time together. We realized this a few years ago when we were in California. We had reservations at this great Italian place in Yucca, we got there and there were TONS of people there, some with reservations some without. We quickly saw that we weren't going to get a table so we went to Pizza Hut instead. We had a great time. It was the time together, not where we had it that mattered. After our mexican fiesta we came home and took a walk together. We haven't done that in a long time (with or without the Kid). I'm typing this before I go pick up the little one, when on returning home she'll be put directly to bed. I love these nights that we have to ourselves. It really makes me realize what an awesome Hubby I have. How much I still love him, after 6 years of marriage and 7 years of knowing him. He's better now than he was back then. He can still make me laugh and he still thinks I'm sexy...can you beat that? I really am the luckiest girl in the world! Thank you God!

Fashion plate

So the Kid and I went to the Lynnhaven Mall yesterday. For many reasons...it was rainy (so the pool was out of the question), there was a store I wanted to look in and they have an awesome play area. We hadn't been there in a long while so it was a treat for both of us. I went to this store that I LOVE called H&M. They have kids clothes up to 12 years and they're so stylish, they also have a great adult section that is very reasonably priced. There's a dress I might go back and get for me. I'd been waiting for these capri leggings to come out for the Kid. They are adorable. She got 3 pairs (pink, red and yellow) and 2 dresses, plus a tshirt. She tried them on in the store (I miss the days I could just give her crap to wear, and she'd wear it) and we had a really good time. So then we went and played, had lunch and went home. The Kid had to try on everything again at home and I HAD to take pictures of her. She also picked up a little stuffed bunny at H&M. She calls her Runaway Bunny as that is her book of choice at the moment. So I thought I'd share. She's getting big. The video I mentioned in the last post is of her dancing around in the Mumu type dress. Can't wait to get it on here.

Add on to last post

Here are two pictures that I couldn't fit into the last post and then I couldn't get them to upload right...I've heard lots of people complaining about blogger lately. Don't you just love a man in uniform. Hub always looks so tastey...too bad he never comes home in them, he'd probably get more action. Ha Ha Ha! Sorry if that was an overshare. The other one is when they called me up to get the certificate...EMBARASSING! I appreciated the appreciation..but what do you say when you hear, "thanks alot for supporting him in this," about a million times. Really?! Each 'big guy' said it about 5 times each, was I supposed to say you're welcome. I just smiled and shook my head. I was just so unprepared...it could have been my moment. I could have had a speech prepared, made all the grown marines cry with my beautifully touching talk on how being there for Hub is what I was meant to do. Make them feel that they should all be so lucky to have a wifey like me to support and take care of them...YEAH RIGHT! I am so not good at this kind of thing and I have a feeling I'll go through it each time Hub re-enlists (though who knows if I'll be as good of buddies with the guys he'll work with then). I love the dudes Hub works with. They're great and they always make me laugh. I've always been more comfy around dudes...though I still feel like an idiot most of the time. Ah, such is life as a Singer offspring. I'm trying to figure out how to put video on here, so check back. I've got a great one of the Kid from yesterday.

Semper Fi Marine!

Well, yesterday the Kid and I headed down the the North Carolina border to Hub's work. We don't head down there to actually go to his work but yesterday was a special day. Hub re-enlisted into the Corps for 4 more years. It was fairly "informal"...just us, the dudes from work and the higher ups. Hub has Major O do the ceremony. This guy is so nice. He was honorably discharged and for a minute there we were no longer a military family. He was then re-instated for more more years of service. I was caught completely off gaurd when they asked me to come up and and they read a letter and certificate for me for supporting Hub through his service to our country. You can't see it in the pictures, but I am SO UNCOMFORTABLE! I'm sure my face to red too. Hub kept looking at me smiling and then tells me after that he had no idea they were going to do that and that he would have warned me. Maybe I wouldn't have shown up had I known. I don't like getting put on the spot. But I could tell Hub was happy they did it. The officers kept thanking me for standing by him. It was a little disconcerting. It's weird, half the time I think I want to be recognized for things I do...but I get so embarrassed when I do. So here are the pictures, Hub is so handsome.

These are most of the dudes that Hub works with. There was one that wasn't there that should have been and it was very irritating. Great bunch of guys and the Kid LOVES them. Hub making his deal with the devil...dog! Ha! (That's Major O, swearing him in)

Signing his life away...not really!

Just like Daddy!

Being the mother of an only child...I hear alot of warnings about not letting the Kid become spoiled. The thing is, I don't know if it would ever be possible (whether we have one or a brood) for our kids NOT to be spoiled. Not with Hub around! The Kid is just like her Daddy! It doesn't matter what it is, a glass of juice, a coloring book, having you cut a picture out of a coloring book, she wants it done NOW! I know part of it is being an only child, that she's used to having our full attention and she's used to things getting done in a timely manner. But I have to tell ya, I think part of it is hereditary. When Hub gets his head around an idea, something that he wants (or desperately needs,) there is no stopping him. He'll come up with 20 different ways to get what he wants, as soon as he can get it. And I, loving wife that I am, have to sit through all of these ideas and plans...then lovingly tell him he's out of his mind. There was the Bronco (which we're now selling), there's always a motorcycle lurking around in the background, there are always golf clubs, radios, computers. There's always a valuable reason to get it right this minute. I can't say that I don't have many of those ideas myself, but more of mine are put to rest than his. I'm not complaining, I think it's hilarious! In fact, I usually try and find a way to get him what he wants. It used to be that he asked for so little that I'd go out of my way to get him what he asked for. Now it's become a little more frequent, but I still do what I can. This weekend we went and picked out a new golf club for Hub (this is the 3rd last golf club he'll have to get for 10 or 15 years). My conversation with the guy that was helping him pick out said club that defines it all.
SalesGuy: Is this a Father's Day present?
Me: No, this is a Daddy gets whatever he asks for present.
To which both Hub and the SalesGuy laughed appreciatively. I have since told Hub that he can never complain about our daughters demanding nature, as she seems to have inherited it directly from him. The two are identical in so many ways...part of me wishes this weren't one of them.